funny sarcastic tweets Fundamentals Explained

Fifth 3rd Bank? I do not Consider you know how to number things, which is one thing I frequently seek out inside of a bank.

For a Kenyan runner faces fraud fees for finishing 2nd within a marathon he concluded under a kilometre of, we existing sport's ballsiest cheats Comments

I do think bragging sucks, don’t get me wrong, but I get it. What I hate about a humble brag is that individuals attempt to come off like they aren’t bragging.

Leaving my browser background open in the event everyone During this espresso store attempts to steal my notebook Once i'm in the toilet.

lIt saddens Norwegians that The usa still honors the Italian Columbus, who arrived late in the New Earth and by accident, who wasn't even enthusiastic about New Worlds but only in spices. Out with a spin in search of curry powder and sizzling peppers- a person over a voyage on the grocery- he stumbled onto the land of heroic Vikings and proceeded to obtain the credit rating for it.

sixty four. wint @dril If the grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it that you are mechanically drafted in to the skeleton war

I should be sick - I assumed I observed a sausage fly past my window, but it had been essentially a seabird. I do think I have taken a tern for your more info wurst.

Platonic: the connection that you just’re supposed to have with 3 men and women in ur life: gf’s best friend, neighbors wife & your boss’s secretary.

“i borrowed ur pen and its been 2 months And that i even now haven’t returned it simply because every time i talk with u, i am reminded of The huge fucking crush i have on u which normally ends up leaving me speechless” au 

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"Republican faces say 'We are lots of conscienceless pricks who'd shoot ourselves inside the face if Obama explained he preferred our smile'" -Bill Maher, on Obama's deal with to the joint session of Congress

sizzling puppies had been invented in 1936 by Larry Hotdogs when he accidentally dropped a bag of prize-winning pig assholes in his Dick Shaper Machine

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